Monday Musings #3 - Networking tips for introverts

Welcome back to my Monday Musings: a random collection of thoughts, musings and ideas.

This week I’m keynoting at Devoxx UK. And while I’m excited, I’m also a little nervous. At heart, I’m still what I like to call a social caterpillar. You know, like a social butterfly, but with a longer instruction manual. We can flutter from one conversation to the next, but it takes a bit more energy and intention to get there.

If you’re someone who feels hesitant about networking (maybe you haven’t done it in a while, or you’re not sure how to start), you’re not alone. Over the years, I’ve picked up a few strategies that help me prepare for the people side of conferences. Here's what I do before the event to make those connections feel a little less intimidating:

💡Prep a simple intro

Practice a short bit to explain who you are and what you do. The more you share that with folks, the easier it gets.

“I work with engineering teams to improve how they work together. I do that through coaching, workshops and consulting.”

🙌 Learn how to join a conversation

It can be scary to interrupt a group who is already talking together but chances are they only just met as well! You don’t have to wait for people to come up to you.

“Mind if I join you?”

🧲 Think of conversation starters

Be curious about the other person. If you don’t want to talk much yourself, ask more questions. Have a few open-ended questions ready like:

“What’s been the highlight of your day so far?”

“Was there anything from the talk that really resonated with you?”

“Have you been to this event before?”

“Do you know many people here, or are you meeting new folks like me?”

👋 Learn how to leave a conversation

It’s okay to leave a conversation if you’re not enjoying it or if it’s run its course.

“It’s been great chatting to you. I’m going to mingle some more, but it was nice to meet you.”

👥 Buddy up

If you know folks who are also going to the same event, meet up with them. But also ask if they can intro you to anyone, or join other groups together.

And if you’re going to Devoxx UK this week and don’t know anyone, come find me! I’m more than happy to introduce you to folks!

💖 Recharge when needed

Recognise when you’re feeling drained and give yourself time to recharge. Understand what works for you.

Don't feel you need to attend every session or participate in every part of the event. That means sometimes having a 1:1 conversation rather than going into a talk or a workshop. Don’t feel guilty about skipping an activity if it means preserving your energy for later.

The main thing is to have fun! I love meeting new people and finding out what they do. Going to conferences and starting conversations with strangers can feel awkward, but having a few good practices can make all the difference.

Next time you’re at an event, try these tips and see where it takes you. You might walk away with a great new connection or at least avoid small talk about the weather!

What are your tips for preparing for conferences?

See you next time,

Melinda